By Pat Orr
For the Apple Valley Review

Vice President Joe Biden’s refusal last week to join the Democratic race for president has robbed us of a unique opportunity to be entertained.

Between Bernie Sanders, who comes off as a cross between the Nutty Professor and Vladimir Lenin, and Mrs. Clinton, who has been doing a wonderful impression of one of the Stepford Wives, this race was getting a little dull. Many political watchers are sorely disappointed that we will not get to see Mr. Biden slip up and really tell us what he thinks of an Obama or Clinton decision while trying to explain how he is different from either of them.

Personally I will miss the spectacle of Lincoln Chafee looking somewhat bewildered at every question during future debates. Apparently they put him back on his meds and he dropped out of the race and went back to the lock-down unit.

As for the Republicans, well frankly at this point I’m embarrassed for them. Apparently even national politics has devolved into a reality show where flash and sizzle are more important than ideas rooted in conviction. It is a sad sign of the times.

One side is always enamored of a trend setter — the first black president or the first woman president and the other side is desperate for mass popularity.

In the end, this system does give us what we're asking for whether it's good for us or not.

Why Trick or Treat?

This Saturday is the day all multi-national candy companies dream of — Halloween in America.

Halloween is actually derived from an ancient Celtic holiday called Samhain (pronounced Sah-win). The Celts believed that October 31 marked the time every year when the boundaries between the living and the dead overlapped.

The dead would return briefly and wander the countryside despoiling crops, scaring animals and doing mischevious, but not necessarily violent, things.

The concept of dressing in costumes and banging on doors for rewards goes back to the middle ages, but was never really associated with Halloween. The whole "costumed kids going door-to-door" concept was created right here in the good old USA.

To take an old world holiday and turn it into a huge profit center takes American ingenuity. How many movies, books, stories and television shows focus on the concepts originating in the “Day of the Dead” holiday? The zombie movies and shows have made millions and are still going strong, except now the term zombie is uncool — these folks are the “undead.”

The trick-or-treat concept originated as a threat. Would the person prefer a trick be played on them or to provide a treat? Just for giggles, when the kids this Saturday yell “trick or treat” at your front door, respond with, “trick, please.” This will really provoke looks of terror on their little faces because they believe this phrase is actually one word, "trickertreat," meaning “give me candy.”

Might as well throw in a little education with that bag of M&Ms.

Out of control advertising?

Lately there have been pro-Ranchos folks upset at the Town for spending money to advertise the "H2Ours" tag line in newspaper ads.

I think it would be healthy if both sides would stop their marketing campaigns.

Friends, this issue is going to a judge somewhere in a jurisdiction where I can almost promise you he/she doesn’t read the Daily Press. The water issue will not be decided by an outcry of public opinion at this point. The fact is, we water rate-paying taxpayers will, foot the bill for both sides of this advertising. Conceivably, if this gets strung out far enough, Carlyle could fund a few of their favorite vocal supporters to take a run at unseating Councilmembers and terminate the process that way, but that is a January 2017 solution.

The process could be well down the road by then.

How about a marketing truce at least? The local folks at Ranchos are good community-minded people who have lived here for years and are caught in the middle and the Town folks are doing what they think is best for the long-term future of Apple Valley. Can’t we play nice and let the naturally bad people, the lawyers, do their job without the expensive ad campaigns that are swaying no one?

— Pat Orr is a local business owner, community volunteer and political junkie.